My mom is a home maker and yesterday out of blue I asked her one weird question “what have you achieved in your life till now”. I was completely surprised when she told me about her achievements despite being a home maker. But when I asked the same question to myself I did not have any answer as I don’t think I have achieved anything till now. To me achievement is like doing something which makes you and others proud of you. I don’t remember when I did something like that. So I started writing to help me elucidating my feelings or thoughts.I have never liked changes as they always demand me to get out of my comfort zone which I feel, just got developed from the last change. Once, my dad told me that a person himself makes his life either simple or complex. It is up to you how you want to make it. I think today I am able to relate myself to this. Since the last 2 years I had always wanted to do MBA but today when I am doing it, still, somewhere I can feel a discontent deep within. No doubt it has given me a hope of having a bright future but as per my economics understanding the opportunity cost is really high. I used to spend this time with my bestest of best friends, used to earn a decent salary and used to visit my hometown every 2 months, used to drive my car and so many other things. But today everything has been prefixed by a dirt of “used to”. Now the only thing which has occupied my mind is how to add value to my resume with whatever I do and think. Again in the new hope of getting a good job. I don’t know how many times this new hope will take away my precious moments which could have been otherwise made beautiful. Sometimes, I really get scared of thinking that if this race will ever come to a halt or not? Will I be able to do all those things which I used to do or will I have to keep running like this or in fact faster than this??
These dreadful thoughts keep running across my mind now and then. Sadly the inability to answer these questions makes my life altogether more uncertain.
It’s not that I am not happy but yea perhaps my life is not that joyful as it was "used to" be.


